Do you remember?

Pixel "#~ schreef:
>> http://grumpygamer.com/8280380
>>
>> I've just started playing CMI again! I still can't see the resemblance
>> between the greatest Scottish tennis player and that skull. On the other
>> hand, they both do quite a lot of grumbling.
>
> They have tennisplayers in Scotland??
>
>
I thought they only played golf and threw huge poles (I could say caber toss,
but this is more fun) whilst wearing skirts (I could say kilt, but again, this
is more fun). The rest of the day they spend eating haggis and drinking scotch
while trying to stay out of the copious amounts rain.

--
Danny.

>>I've just started playing CMI again! I still can't see the resemblance
>>between the greatest Scottish tennis player and that skull. On the other
>>hand, they both do quite a lot of grumbling.
>
> They have tennisplayers in Scotland??

probably as many as Dutch mountaineers!

Mac

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> I thought they only played golf and threw huge poles (I could say caber
> toss,
> but this is more fun) whilst wearing skirts (I could say kilt, but again,
> this is more fun). The rest of the day they spend eating haggis and
> drinking scotch while trying to stay out of the copious amounts rain.

Did you know that golf was probably invented by the Dutch about 800 years
ago? I live about 5km, as the fish swim, from the, so-called, home of golf.
Kasper is the man for huge Poles! Some of us wear kilts, only to distinguish
us from our Southern neighbours. Most of us drink whisky to disguise the
flavour of haggis. I've been watering the garden every day for the last two
weeks; did I miss something!

Mac


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>> Did you know that golf was probably invented by the Dutch about 800 years
>> ago? I live about 5km, as the fish swim, from the, so-called, home of
>> golf.
>
> Hold on! Where do these fish of yours swim? If it was invented by the
> Dutch and you live in Scotland, then they must have found a shortcut.
> Or the other possibility might be that 800 years ago the Dutch went to
> Scotland to invent golf, but why would they want to go to Scotland for
> that?

For someone who is omnipotent and I assume therefore omnifiscent, the answer
is obvious. They invented the game here, because we have all the best golf
courses.

>> Kasper is the man for huge Poles! Some of us wear kilts, only to
>> distinguish
>> us from our Southern neighbours. Most of us drink whisky to disguise the
>> flavour of haggis. I've been watering the garden every day for the last
>> two
>> weeks; did I miss something!
>
> You forgot that spot right underneath your window. We Dutch people
> need that spot for the 800th anniversary of golf. Have some more
> whisky, haggis, or better even, have both!

*Fills watering can with whisky*. Now the grass should come up half cut.
(That joke was supplied by Chic Murray, deceased Scottish comedian, who now
probably just uses his surname).

Mac

> --
> ervaqre is wicked sick
>
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> signature database 4138 (20090608) __________
>
> The message was checked by ESET Smart Security.
>
> http://www.eset.com
>
>
>


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MacSporran schreef:
>>> Did you know that golf was probably invented by the Dutch about 800
>>> years
>>> ago? I live about 5km, as the fish swim, from the, so-called, home of
>>> golf.
>>
>> Hold on! Where do these fish of yours swim? If it was invented by the
>> Dutch and you live in Scotland, then they must have found a shortcut.
>> Or the other possibility might be that 800 years ago the Dutch went to
>> Scotland to invent golf, but why would they want to go to Scotland for
>> that?
>
> For someone who is omnipotent and I assume therefore omnifiscent, the
> answer is obvious. They invented the game here, because we have all the
> best golf courses.

Then explain how windmills were invented in the Iran/Irak area, since they don't
have the best windfarms.

>>> Kasper is the man for huge Poles! Some of us wear kilts, only to
>>> distinguish
>>> us from our Southern neighbours. Most of us drink whisky to disguise the
>>> flavour of haggis. I've been watering the garden every day for the
>>> last two
>>> weeks; did I miss something!
>>
>> You forgot that spot right underneath your window. We Dutch people
>> need that spot for the 800th anniversary of golf. Have some more
>> whisky, haggis, or better even, have both!
>
> *Fills watering can with whisky*. Now the grass should come up half cut.
> (That joke was supplied by Chic Murray, deceased Scottish comedian, who
> now probably just uses his surname).
>
Where does he rank on a Krankies to Connolly scale? Those are the only two
Scottish comedy acts I know from the top of my head.

--
Danny.

>> For someone who is omnipotent and I assume therefore omnifiscent, the
>> answer is obvious. They invented the game here, because we have all the
>> best golf courses.
>
> Then explain how windmills were invented in the Iran/Irak area, since they
> don't have the best windfarms.

When Ayatollah Khomeni took over Iran, and changed the system laid down by
the Shahs of Persia, part of his purge was to remove all windfarms. He had
been misinformed, being told that windfarms were very large farting
establishments. This, of course, made their windmills redundant, and that is
when a Dutch tourist and part-time entrepreneur, who was in the area, bought
them all as a job lot, and shipped them all back to the Netherlands.

>>>> Kasper is the man for huge Poles! Some of us wear kilts, only to
>>>> distinguish
>>>> us from our Southern neighbours. Most of us drink whisky to disguise
>>>> the
>>>> flavour of haggis. I've been watering the garden every day for the last
>>>> two
>>>> weeks; did I miss something!
>>>
>>> You forgot that spot right underneath your window. We Dutch people
>>> need that spot for the 800th anniversary of golf. Have some more
>>> whisky, haggis, or better even, have both!
>>
>> *Fills watering can with whisky*. Now the grass should come up half cut.
>> (That joke was supplied by Chic Murray, deceased Scottish comedian, who
>> now probably just uses his surname).
>>
> Where does he rank on a Krankies to Connolly scale? Those are the only two
> Scottish comedy acts I know from the top of my head.

That conjures up a great picture! Scottish comedy acts emitting from Danny's
head. Billy Connolly got a large percentage of his material and ideas from
Chic Murray, who was a very, dry, droll and exceedingly funny comedian;
whereas the krankies are a complete embarrassment to our national pride.

Mac


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MacSporran schreef:
>>> For someone who is omnipotent and I assume therefore omnifiscent, the
>>> answer is obvious. They invented the game here, because we have all
>>> the best golf courses.
>>
>> Then explain how windmills were invented in the Iran/Irak area, since
>> they don't have the best windfarms.
>
> When Ayatollah Khomeni took over Iran, and changed the system laid down
> by the Shahs of Persia, part of his purge was to remove all windfarms.
> He had been misinformed, being told that windfarms were very large
> farting establishments. This, of course, made their windmills redundant,
> and that is when a Dutch tourist and part-time entrepreneur, who was in
> the area, bought them all as a job lot, and shipped them all back to the
> Netherlands.

That's not how I remember it. Denmark and Portugal are ahead of the Netherlands
and the US, Germany and Spain also have far more windpower.

>>>>> Kasper is the man for huge Poles! Some of us wear kilts, only to
>>>>> distinguish
>>>>> us from our Southern neighbours. Most of us drink whisky to
>>>>> disguise the
>>>>> flavour of haggis. I've been watering the garden every day for the
>>>>> last two
>>>>> weeks; did I miss something!
>>>>
>>>> You forgot that spot right underneath your window. We Dutch people
>>>> need that spot for the 800th anniversary of golf. Have some more
>>>> whisky, haggis, or better even, have both!
>>>
>>> *Fills watering can with whisky*. Now the grass should come up half
>>> cut. (That joke was supplied by Chic Murray, deceased Scottish
>>> comedian, who now probably just uses his surname).
>>>
>> Where does he rank on a Krankies to Connolly scale? Those are the only
>> two Scottish comedy acts I know from the top of my head.
>
> That conjures up a great picture! Scottish comedy acts emitting from
> Danny's head. Billy Connolly got a large percentage of his material and
> ideas from Chic Murray, who was a very, dry, droll and exceedingly funny
> comedian; whereas the krankies are a complete embarrassment to our
> national pride.

Wasn't the little boy/chick named the most Scottish person or something?

I looked up a bit of Chic Murray and the closest thing I can come up with is
Roger Dangerfield. Chic seems more mellow though.

--
Danny.

>> When Ayatollah Khomeni took over Iran, and changed the system laid down
>> by the Shahs of Persia, part of his purge was to remove all windfarms. He
>> had been misinformed, being told that windfarms were very large farting
>> establishments. This, of course, made their windmills redundant, and that
>> is when a Dutch tourist and part-time entrepreneur, who was in the area,
>> bought them all as a job lot, and shipped them all back to the
>> Netherlands.
>
> That's not how I remember it. Denmark and Portugal are ahead of the
> Netherlands and the US, Germany and Spain also have far more windpower.

As I said, that Dutch entrepreneur took them all, but the Netherlands had
too many, so he sold them on.

> Wasn't the little boy/chick named the most Scottish person or something?
>
> I looked up a bit of Chic Murray and the closest thing I can come up with
> is Roger Dangerfield. Chic seems more mellow though.

There's some *chic* stuff on utube. The small Krankie was the other one's
wife.

Mac


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"ervaqre" wrote in message

> MacSporran is a mighty pirate...
>
>> For someone who is omnipotent and I assume therefore omnifiscent, the
>> answer
>> is obvious. They invented the game here, because we have all the best
>> golf
>> courses.
>
> So what were the Dutch doing in Scotland at that time??

I meant *omniscien*, must be the whisky! The Dutch were here, trying to sell
us dubious Iranian windmills.

>>> You forgot that spot right underneath your window. We Dutch people
>>> need that spot for the 800th anniversary of golf. Have some more
>>> whisky, haggis, or better even, have both!
>>
>> *Fills watering can with whisky*. Now the grass should come up half cut.
>> (That joke was supplied by Chic Murray, deceased Scottish comedian, who
>> now
>> probably just uses his surname).
>
> Uh...just gimme teh wodka!

Slainte Mhath!

Mac


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> Well, I have this windmill right here and I think you might be
> interested once you hear about all the amazing new features. It's
> nothing like those windmills we offered 800 years ago.

If it's still at the old price, I'll take it. *Digs out 8 wooden nickels
from his LinuxSporran.*

>>> Uh...just gimme teh wodka!
>>
>> Slainte Mhath!

Gaelic for "good health"

Mac


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